Curating: “The Stars release another album”

Before: I love The Stars. Maggie first introduced me to them, and at first I hated them. I got the impresssion that they were pretentious and inaccessible. But I had a crush on Micaela who loved them, so I listened to them until I discovered what they were about. And then I did. I listened to that album until I got it and it became close to my heart and evocative of the deepest emotions. And then came the excitement of the new album. Finally I had something that I had discovered without Emma. I was so ready to love it more than anything else and she would be so impressed with me. But I don’t think it was like that for me. 


After: Huh, I had forgotten how whole heartily I believed in the Mask back then.


I reached my fingers into the ridge between left and right sides of my brain; press quickly and deeply inside and grasp at the edges. Gently I tug. Again I pull. Finally I wrench my knuckles against the razor edge. The mask smiles serenely in place as I wash the blood off my hands. As days pass, the mask grows deeper, widening like the rings of a tree. The grin tightens into a grimace.

Then I fell.

My head hit the pavement as my feet twist over the boulders that littered my path. 

When face meets the road, there is a burst of sparks and the mask breaks into a million parts that can never be created again and the light burns the unblemished skin and the gravel cuts it and the salt burns it. But now I have a face that I know is mine and only mine. No one else can ever have a face as scarred, and burdened, and beautifully, wonderfully, mine as this face. I love now and forever. 


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