Why I meet with people

I’m a collector of people. I look for who people are, tease them out of their shells, offer bits of myself as bait, and once they’re fully out, I take their picture. And then into my mental catalogue I enter my observations and their image. I say to myself, I know you. I understand you. I have your shape. Maybe I’m a shape shifter, assuming the forms of people I have known. Maybe I use the catalogue as my mirror, looking for myself in the pieces of the people I have known. Maybe I collect people because everyone needs a hobby and stamps are expensive.

Whatever the reason, whatever the cause, I have taken to collecting people simply because I can no longer stop.

I met with Kevin today and have taken the first step towards understanding my audience, how I am to take the course, how I will learn from him, how he might be able to learn from me.

I met with Christy today because I know that there is so much more that I can learn from her.

I met with Paul today because I am fascinated by his fur.

I met with Rives yesterday because I think that he’s still hiding himself and I refuse to let anyone hide in my presence.

I met with Aaron yesterday because I want to be able to assume his shape and his negative space.

I met with Dr. Panning today because I am crazy and that is what crazy people do. I keep hoping we’ll uncover something about me that I don’t want to know. That I’m secretly much deeper than I perceive myself. That I’ll learn to be a better person through working with her. If sociopaths can become more adept at hiding through therapy, I hope I’ll stand out brighter through my skin.

I met with people. I will continue to meet with people. I’ll collect my souls and squirrel them away.

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